The Game of Youth!
by Aburame Megumi
Summary: Hey Kids! Hey Pegleg! Wanna Read About THings Imploding? YAH! Then read about Chouko's horrible cooking! YEAAA!
1. Chouko's Intro

Pegleg really didn't knwo what she was doing. Which was pretty darn stupid. Some characters just...shouldn't get together, because things implode when they get together. Just...too much youth at once...can make bad things happen. VERY BAD THINGS. But she was bored, she had a computer, along with piles of work which she was too fearful to face, adn so thus came this most interesting story...all by improv...(so if its stupid, well too bad).

once upon a time, as every story begins, there was a little girl. Ok, well she wasn't that little. She was--oh yea high and yea big, which really isn't descriptive, but I thought it sounded funny . Anyways, the reason that she was yea big was because she was an Akimichi, which meant that she was fated to be (more or less) plump. Not fat, since that's not politically correct; just...plump. But it wasn't a bad plump. It was a youthful happy jolly HOHOHO plump that said "HEY IM NOT BULEMIC!" And who, may you ask was this non-bulemic, jolly HOHOHO "just plump" girl? Why, it was none other than the "Demon Cook", Akimichi Chouko.

Anyways, on to what the protagonist was doing, aye! And by the way, I'm CANADIAN, yosh! O.o

Tien (my new Viet character that I thought of for Once in teh Moonlight): NO MORE ADD MOMENTS! WHACK!

Pegleg: G...Gomen...

Chouko was out to the store to buy some youthful ingredients! Well, this was how it happened...

Chouji woke up to the smell of things burning. "...CHOUKO..." he said trhough gritted teeth as he threw off the sheet. And indeed, his nose did not deceive him; his nee chan was burnign things. In fact, there was a giant rising flame to prove it.

"CHOUKO WHAT THE FREAKIN HECK ARE YOU DOING??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?" CHouji belted out, almost expanding to ten times his size.

"Oh..." Chouko said innocently, hiding the flames with her pastel yellow top. "Nothing!"

"I smell defiled food!" since in Chouji's mind, any food burned or not cooked to its full potential was "defiled". That's why he called his nee chan the "Demon Cook".

"DO NOT! YOUR NOSE LIES!!!" Chouko cried out.

Being too lazy to fight, Chouji decided to use his "SNEAKY SNEAKY SHIKAMARU INSPIRED PLANS". ... "Chouko, don't you wanna go to the store and get more food?"

"HAI!" And with that, Chouji's "SNEAKY SNEAKY SHIKAMARU INSPIRED PLANS" worked, adn Chouko was gone.

"Good riddance," he uttered as he went back to sleep.

As Chouko chan was walkng, she ran into her supah supah role model, Ino chan! Figuratively run in, that is, not literally. Otherwise, Ino would have a giant icecream stain (since she was carrying icecream! YOSH!) on her new Ambercrombie and Fitch top, which would not be good indeed.

"Hey, Chouko nee chan!" Ino grinned.

"INO SAN!" Chouko said with utter admiration twinkling in her more or less squinted eyes.

"Whacha doin here?" Ino asked.

"Oh---Chouji wanted me to get more food. Again. Well, actually, it was just a "SNEAKY SNEAKY SHIKAMARU INSPIRED PLAN" to get me out of the house, which I fell for," she pouted slightly, wonderin gwhy her brother hated her. It made her feel unloved.

"Chouji no baka," Ino scowled out into the background of Konoha. Wihch Nani, who was buying some YOUTHFUL FRUIT happened to notice, and think was directed to her, so she began to think unyouthful thoughts about Ino back. "How can he be such a jerk but have you as a sister?" she grinned. "Don't listen to your brother. You're great. You're cooking-well-ano-" she began to think. "Just could use--a little improvement!" she grinned awkwardly. "BUt hey, everyone needs improvement!"

"Oh, not you, Ino san!" Chouko smiled. "Your Mind transfer jutsu's amazing! I wish I ahd a cool jutsu like that!" Chouko saddened for a moment. "I wish I had any jutsu, really. All I can do is the stupid Kekki genkai to get big." she pouted. "But what kind of girl wants to get huge?" she poked her stomach fat. "I'm already fat..." she sighed.

Well, Ino, being totally anorexically thin, had no idea how to help. "It's ...ok," she tried to console. "You're an Akimichi..." she covered her mouth, thinking that to be exactly what she SHOULDNT have said. "I MEAN-Its' just-puberty!" which was even more awkward. But hey; chouko chan was what...11? so, it was the time of self doubt.

Chouko, being horribly naive, was confused. "What-do you mean, Ino san?"

"I mean-" she thought quickly, thinking of her old bestest bestest frined Sakura. "Its a time where you doubt yourself. But You'll blossom, don't worry! Its a girl thing," she winked. "Chouji wouldn't understand." There. The blossomign lecture. 'Works everytime..." ino grinned to herself.

Chouko smiled weakly. "Thanks, Ino san. I feel-a bit better now."

And so the hallmark moment ended. But that really doesnt matter, because now is where the story is actually going to get good!

Tien pulls out iPod earbuds: HOw do you know that? This is improv, remember?

Pegleg: SHHHH!

Because this is when Chouko collided with the utter Youth of Konoha. IN a grochery store. Yes, a groshers. Yes, and Pegleg's spellign sucks. And she's too lazy to use spell check. But no matter. ... HEY, ZANE!

Zane DJ MAN: Un?

Pegleg: That's when the Dramatic Naruto theme was supposed to come in and subtly close the episode!

Zane: Oh...gomen.

plays track

Peglge: NOT NOW, BAKA! (can't believe she just calld her hot dj a baka) ITS RUINED! Now I have to start all over!

Because this is when Chouko collided with the utter Youth of Konoha. IN a grochery store. How little did she realize how her life was not yet even close to chaotic...but that would soon change...

music plays

Zane: That ending sucked.

Pegleg: TOO BAD! out


	2. Nani's Part in All of This

Nani was still buying Youthful fruit! And not jsut any youthful fruit, but ORGANIC youthful fruit. That was Rock Lee's favourite, aye? (remember, I'm canadian wink wink)

Yes...

Rock Lee san...

Her hero, role model, love, everything. She didn't want to soudn obsessed, but his mastery over Tai jutsu, his encouraging spirit, his good looks ...

Sakura: hey, love is blind.

Pegleg: WILL YOU SHUT IT, PINKIE?

well, she actually liked his eyebrows. They showed character. In fact, to Nani, ANYTHING showed Character.

flashback

"OSA!" Nani grinned. She was feeling particularly youthful today.

"...?" Osa groggily asked. She wanted an Eggroll. With duck sause. Oh, youthful high fructose corn syrup filled Duck Sauce. With Eggrolls...Oh, so good...

"I think we should go do laps around konoha!" . She had jsut seen Lee and Gai run youthfully around konoha. She was jealous. And Osa was the only victim for miles. Or, just teh only one Nani felt comfortable asking. Or begging. Or whatever.

"...Ugh...why?" Osa looked at her clock. It said 5 thirty am. No.

"Because...it builds character!"

"How the heck does it build character?"

"because...IT DOES!"

"You say everything builds character.."

FLASH BACK IN FLASHBACK!

"OSa?"

"Un?"

"You should eat your vegetables!"

"Why?"

"Because it builds character!"

"You say everything builds character.."

FLASH BACK IN FLASHBACK IN FLASHBACK!

"Osa..?"

"Yah,"

"How about we clean up Tsunade's office? Doesn't that soudn like youthful fun?"

"...why am I your victim?"

"Because you lack character!"

"...and?"

"Because it builds character!"

"You say everything builds character.."

FLASH BACK IN FLASHBACK IN FLASHBACK IN FLASHBACK!

"Osa?"

"Hey, Nani!"

"How would you like to clean my toilet?"

"?!?!?!?!??!"

"It builds character! ."

Tien: OK WE GET THE IDEA!!!!

Pegleg: . YEA REPETITION!

So yes, Nani's goal in life was to build character. Oh yah. And now, by picking lovely organic youthful fruit for her beloved lee, she woudl be building even more character! YOSH!

But at that very moment, she ran into someone that she knew fairly well through lee, megumi aburame! GASP!

"HEy, youthful Megu chan!" Nani smiled

"Hey, Youhtful Nani san! How be you?"

"I be...doing well! I'm picking some youthful organic fruit for Lee kun!"

"OOOH! Can I help?"

"...I guess," Nani kinda wanted it to be from her ONLY for her ONLY lee. ONLY for her. Un. But Hey, Megumi was dating Kiba, and saw Lee as a big brother. What harm could it do?

pegleg: ...this might get dramatic?

Shino: Oh snap, I don't think I can bear it sarcastic wave of hands

Pegleg" ...Are you mocking me?

Shino: Heckno. Why would I bother? Do I honestly have enough enthusiasm to do that?

Pegleg; Just shut up and watch oyur sister make a fool of herself.

Shino: cool laugh which goes like Heh

Megumi: HEY! 8 

So...Nani and Megumi began to pick fruit. Now I can't remember what happens becuase my baka of a computer deleted it all. CURSE YOU SHORT TIME SERVER!!!!!! whacks computer

Anyways, Megumi stopped when she noticed a coconut. Megumi loved coconuts. Ever since watching Monty Python, she was inspired and grew to love the nut-fruit-thing. Of youth. So, with that said, I shall continue.

"OOOH COCONUT!" So Megumi used her INDIVISIBLE COCONUT SPITTING JUTSU to cut the coconut into two nice even halves.

"NANI?"! Nani belted ironically, though she had to admit, that was a pretty snazzy jutsu.

Pegleg: HAHA! PEGLEG MADE A CORNY JOKE!!!!

Tien: whacks pegleg upside head with frying pan

With that, Megumi began to drink the coconut milk. And there was a lot of milk in it.

"Wait…" Nani realized. "We haven't paid for that yet.." But as though Meugmi had the attention span to care! Once it was empty, she took the two empty halves and clomped them together, making the noise of horse hoofs, and began running around Konoha as though on horseback. Yes, she was high…off coconut milk.

Nani slammed her head against her palm. "I knew this wouldn't end well..I KNEW IT,"

"IS something the matter, youthful Nani?" And there was her knight clad in green spandex armor, ROCK LEE!

"LEE!" Nani looked up happily.

Lee blinked blankly as he noticed Megumi trot around Konoha. "IS that….the youthful Megumi chan?"

Blink Blink. "Ano….hai."

"Why…is she acting like she's riding a horse?"

"She's high off coconut milk-" 

"NANI!" Lee gasped. "You should never say high! She's just…" he gulped. "YOUTHFUL off coconut milk.

A sweat drop appeared on the back of Nani's prettiful hair. "Hai, Lee. Just…youthful."


	3. All Together now!

Well, according to Osa, Nani is in fact Lee's "rival" in a sense, so she doesn't like him. Darn it. Well, so we're goign to magically remove Lee from this scene and continue, as though none of this ever happened. No offense Lee.

Lee: Oh youthful fudge cakes.

Megumi: Gomen.

So, anyways, to edit what has happened, Nani is SITLL buying magical organic fruit, but it is in fact to throw at walls to improve her Tai-jutsu trainign to beat Lee. Buwahahahhahahaha.

So, as Megumi is banging coconuts, Ino and Chouko come into the scene. They are innocently walking as pedestrians, that is until Megumi accidentaly ran into them.

The rasberry chocolate gasped. "HOLY RUSTED METAL-I JUST RAN INTO PEDESTRIANS!" She cried out, rahter distressed. "ASIAN PEDESTRIANS AT THAT!" Ino's knee bled.

"You baka..." Ino muttered as she got up. She and Megumi hadn't had a very good past together. It had involved rotting eggs, Shikamaru and hot fudge syrup. Very very bad indeed. (actually, pegleg just thought of random things...)

"Um..." Chouko looked up. "Who are you?'

Megumi looked down angrily. "Ah! How can you not knwo me? I'm the illustrious Kanji Mistress, Aburame Megumi!" She explained over dramatically.

"...Never heard of you!" Chouko replied innocently.

Of course of course! Megumi never had really interacted with the INOSHIKACHO gang before, except for that awkward incident thereafter entitled THE COCO-INO FIESCO. Don't ask. So how would his sister know of her?

"Oh...wait..." Chouko studied Megumi. "I think I've heard of you...Weren't you on a mission with Nii san?"

Megumi mused back to a flashback that never was, in whihc she and Chouji were on a B rank mission with nameless chunnin who are unspecial and unnamed. "Ah! Hai!"

"Yah.." Chouko beamed. "He said you were fat."

"?!?!?!?!" dramatic fall backwards "NANI??!?!" Which was rather funny, considering that Megumi was pretty thin. Ino chuckled in teh background.

"Chouji said someone was fat? Ha, now that's really saying somethign..."

"He said you were a whale!" (you must say it like HUWAIL . ) Chouko giggled.

"WHA-" Megumi stopped. "Oh right-"

Imaginary Flashback that NEVER WAS!!!!-

Chouji fell asleep. AGAIN. In his hand were those cursed pork rinds.

"Pork rinds," Kamizuru Kichirou snickered, who was in fact Megumi's distant cousin. "Gets him every time,"

Now megumi never lost an opportunity to take advantage of Chouji's sleep. Walkign over to him, she plopped down, sitting right on his hunk of stomach.

"?!?!?!?" Chouji woke with a bolt to find Megumi sitting on him, grinning,"oh the pain," he dramatically moaned, unable to get up.

"HEHEH!" Megumi giggled, sticking her tongue out.

"You whale" (again, HWHAIL) he growled as nameless nin and Kamizuru Kichirou snickered.

END FLASHBACK THAT NEVER WAS

"Hehehe...sitting on Chouji is fun..." Megumi mused.

"WTR?????" Ino's jaw dropped. What the Rice!

"Why...were you sitting on my brother?"

"Because he was a lazy bum and I needed to sit down!"

"...oh!" REvelation hit Chouko.

"...That is so wrong," Ino shook her head in her palm.

"Hehe---Chouji nii san's a lazy bum!" Chouko grinned. In the background, none other than Hyuuga Osa appeared.

"OSA CHAN!" Meugmi grinned and gave her a hug.

Eggrolls...Osa mused.

"Wow, this is confusing!" Megumi pondered aloud for everyone to hear her talk to herself. "There's Osa...and then there' s Oza!"

Artemis: Its not that hard, really.

"..." Osa, who was really like sleepwalking, wandered off to a stall to buy a giant watermelon but walked into a pole. Owch...Pole...

"Osa chan!" easily distracted Megumi ran over to Osa, leaving a wounded Ino and a happy Chouko.

"..." Ino and Chouko picked up the basic food eneds and walked back to the Akimichi residence.

"NII SANNNN!" Chouko grinned.

"You sound like taht Aburame girl"

"No..." Shino, who happened tob e there moaned. "The OniKo...(demon child)..."

"I just met her! She's really nice! She called you a lazy bum!" Chouko said in a continuous stream with a smile.

"...Well, I call her a whale " (keep going HWALE!)

"A...whale?" Pronounced incorrectly by a stupid Bugboy

Shino: HEY!

"Yes, a whale" Pronounced correctly by a smart ChubbyBoy

Chouji: HEY! I'm not Chubby! Just...plump! Pleasantly Plump!

Kankurou: Yes, and I don't wear Temari's makeup

Temari: evil glare

"...um...why?"

"Because she's fat,"

Shino considered that ABURA actually could be translated as Fat, and just shrugged. He still didn't understand Chouji. In fact, he thought the guy was weird. SO why was he here? For the story's sake, of course!

"..." Ino, with nothing of intelligence to say, walked out, which brought awkward silence. But htat's how most stories end, am I right?

END Oo


End file.
